Is my purpose to learn how to experience moments of deep awareness and relaxation and is this an exciting and momentous start but doesn’t the actual doing have a thousand and one escape hatches? Will my being fail if I don’t find a way to make myself available to silence? Is failure the normal way? Is it that the being only responds and doesn’t win or lose?

Do I really take credit for being able to hear and smell and see and think and touch and digest and reason and love? I choose and claim to feel and understand and know. Isn’t this enough? Isn’t this a dream ride? What’s the purpose to it all? Is one purpose a hide and seek game with existence? Is this the deepest game?

Sensing and no words?

Must I ride knowingly the big now to be truly complete? Or is the big now just a bonus, a perk that has to be uncovered? Is understanding combined with work, a path?


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